FIRST IMPRESSIONS AREN’T EVERYTHING
I was walking down the beach this past weekend with a friend and we were admiring the beauty that surrounded us. Listening to the sounds of ocean waves crashing, feeling the sunshine’s rays on our skin and appreciating the beautiful array of colored stones beneath us. I had started a semi-tradition last year of collecting a “special rock” to remember each moment I shared with someone at the beach. You could say I love collecting memories.
We continued along our journey until I came across a stone that caught my attention. It was different. It was shiny and it sparkled. It stood out. It was black, but had a ribbon of other colors flowing through it. Without hesitation or question, this was “my rock” and I put it in my pocket to cherish it.
I forgot about this rock until the next day when I pulled it out of my jacket pocket. Virtually unrecognizable, this rock was no longer shiny, no longer appealing. It no longer stood out to me. The things that I once fell in love with just 24 hours ago, were gone. I was ready to toss it.
As I sat there having dinner with that same friend that evening, the topic of the stone came up. I realized in that moment of conversation, that the stone represented a lot more than just a memory. It was like a metaphor for love and relationships.
When we first meet someone, we don’t know anything about them. We are attracted to them-their exterior. They are “shiny” and appealing. There’s nothing to really tarnish that so early in. Treasured and cherished, you are excited about the potential and you can’t imagine that feeling might change. Everything is surfaced and based on fragile stuff. You don’t see the underlying potential issues. You don’t think about the fact that maybe this person is giving you their very best, but it may not be what they truly are. Let’s face it, everybody always puts their best foot forward at the beginning of relationships. In time, the shininess begins to wear off. You begin to see the “real person”. The “ribbons” of their personality are either still attractive to you or definitely not.
It’s very hard to judge anyone by just looking at them. Appearances can be deceiving. True connection goes well beyond the surface. Just as the ocean seems to bring out the “shininess” of the rock, sometimes being around the right person can bring out the best in you too. You take the rock out of it’s right and natural environment and it just doesn’t have the same sparkle. It’s the same in relationships. With the right person you can conquer the world together. You feel fulfilled and like the best version of you. With the wrong one, it’s like an anchor. You don’t grow or progress, instead just remain stagnant and dull.
Make sure that you don’t judge a book by it’s cover. It’s not always the ones who come in shiny packages that are the best for you. Take time to get to know someone. Take time to get deeper. Look beneath the surface and you might find that you actually feel quite comfortable there. Sometimes if you are lucky enough, the shiny package is also a beautiful soul.. PLEASE MARRY THAT PERSON!!! 😉 lol
As for the stone, I kept it as a memory and a reminder to always look beyond the sparkly surface. 😉
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